Who in this world does not know their own house address?
Well, you would be surprised to know that many times as my team and I search for a specific house address we are greeted with puzzled looks from inhabitants who have no clue of their house address. We often ponder how is this possible.
Yet, it is.
Categories: Uncategorized
Tagged: Bangladesh, no address
There are some people in this world that I could wish ill for, but recently I got the news that one the sweetest humans I know has been diagnosed. No one expected it. Not even her doctors thought she could be a candidate for this particular strain of the disease and yet, she has now been diagnosed. Today, I finally received the “official” email from my Uncle detailing her situation.
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Dear All,
Please forgive my rudeness in sending you all a generic letter. But I think you all will want to know the details of her illness and treatment. This is the only way I could let all of you know as I am so pressed for time. I hope you will understand.
Some of you may recall that she had been trying to lose weight for about a year. Few months ago we noticed that she was suddenly losing weight much faster than expected. We got worried and went to the doctor and then a series of tests began. Our primary care physician sent her to a gynecologist. Her Pap test and mammogram came normal. She developed some stomach pain. We went to a gastroenterologist who gave her Prevacid and her pain subsided.Her weight loss continued. The doctors got a CT scan of the entire abdomen done in December followed by a nuclear test of the liver. Both came normal. In the meantime she also removed some more items from her diet and was eating less. Her snoring gradually reduced to no snoring. (We were worried about possible sleep apnea because of her snoring and had scheduled a sleep study.) Her breathing problem improved. Her use of the inhaler came down from three times a day to once a day. Some days she did not need inhaler at all. I was confused.
She developed some stomach pain on Monday, March 10th. Then it went away but came back on Tuesday. Tuesday night she woke up from sleep with severe pain. I took her to Akron General Hospital emergency at around 3 a.m. in the morning. After a few hours and some tests she was diagnosed as having pancreatitis—inflammation of the pancreas. They kept her in the hospital until Saturday afternoon and treated her for pancreatitis.
In the meantime the doctors performed ultrasound and CT scan of the abdomen and found some abnormality in her stomach for which they did endoscopy on Friday. Endoscopy revealed ulcer in her stomach. They sent stomach tissue for biopsy to find out the exact nature of the ulcer. On Wednesday we found out that the biopsy results were positive. The ulcer has turned into a malignant tumor.
The reason we did not let you know earlier was not that we wanted to maintain secrecy, but because we could not tell our children three of whom were out of town. Z was in California and S had exams and was busy catching up with her papers. Another concern was that she was alone in her dorm room as her room mate had transferred from Hiram College to another school at the end of the last semester. We wanted to make sure that they did not get the bad news from other sources without proper preparation.
There is no history of the stomach cancer or any other cancer in her family nor does she fall in the category of people whose lifestyle and eating habits may lead to stomach cancer. That is why the doctors never suspected stomach cancer for her nor did we.
Although she has not been as health-conscious as I have been, she has maintained a healthier lifestyle than most people. She biked on the street until recently and has been more or less judicious in her food choices. Although her family has a history of heart disease and diabetes she kept her cholesterol and blood sugar levels within normal range without any medicines or supplements. We both had an annual medical checkup every year since early 1990s. They had always been normal. This diagnosis was very unexpected and devastating for us.
For a second opinion we went to Cleveland Clinic, where she is being seen now. She has been scheduled for surgery on Monday, April 7 in Cleveland Clinic and is expected to be in the hospital for about five days after surgery. The surgeon has recommended rest and relaxation till then.
I know it’s going to be devastating news to all of you. Most of us don’t know how to react to news like this or what to say. We have never been taught or trained how to talk with a cancer patient. But remember that nothing is more important for a cancer patient than being in good spirit. If you decide to call, please keep this in mind. Please do not ask about the details. I have tried to give you all the details in this email so that you don’t have to ask her. Please do not call right away if you are shocked at the news. Call after you have overcome the shock. Call when you are in good spirit. I know being in good spirit will not be easy after this news. But that is what you must try to accomplish because you love her and you want her speedy recovery. If it is difficult for you, imagine how difficult it is for us!
She is usually in good spirit until some one calls and starts crying or feels so sad that s/he cannot hide it from his/her voice. These are very loving and well meaning people who want the very best for her; just don’t know how to control or hide their feelings. She sometimes feels guilty for causing suffering to these nice, loving and kind people!
Your feeling sad isn’t going to help her. The best thing you can do for her is to cheer her up. Make her laugh. Tell her cancer success stories if you know of any. There are people who had suffered from stomach cancer in the 1970’s and are still living and cancer free! Some of our friends are calling us and telling us such encouraging true stories. You may also talk about her hobbies like the Jeopardy Show, crossword puzzles, celebrities and royalties. It is probably not a good idea to ask “How are you?”. That will immediately focus her attention to the disease and make her feel bad. That is precisely what we are trying to avoid. Maybe we have to think non-traditionally and be creative in our conversation with her. Good feelings, smile and laughter strengthen the body’s immune system and stimulate the healing mechanism. This is a scientific fact.
Most people who survive cancer are those who can maintain a good spirit, are optimistic and hopeful, have strong will to live, who feel they are needed by their families and friends, who feel loved and who can laugh heartily. Renowned American writer Norman Cousins, author of “Anatomy of an Illness”, laughed his cancer away as documented in the Journal of American Medical Association (JAMA) by watching comedies most of the day for several months! Laughter IS the best medicine. So cheer up—both for yourself and for her.
You can rest assured that she’s getting the best treatment available today. The rest is in God’s hand. Cleveland Clinic has one of the best cancer treatment facilities in the world. Her surgeon, Dr Henderson, is one of the top in his field. Until recently, he was head of general surgery at Cleveland Clinic.
She also has plenty of support. She has some very good American friends in addition to all Bangladeshis here who all love her very much and would do anything they could for her. So do not think she is alone in a foreign country. Don’t feel bad thinking that you are not near her to help her. We have probably ten times more help than we can use. She is also getting telephone support from friends and relatives all over the world.
The best thing you can do now is to pray for her. Research on prayer shows that people who believe that their prayer will be answered have a better chance of their prayer being answered. While praying, people who hold an image of what they want, rather than what they do not want, increase the chances of getting what they want. So when you pray for her, her image in your mind should be the healthy, hearty and jolly her that you have always seen. When you pray for her do not forget to thank God for the excellent health she had enjoyed until now. Gratitude is another secret of effective prayer.
Those of you, who do not pray, can do something scientific. According to world-renowned physicist and professor emeritus of Materials Science at Stanford University Dr William Tiller, we create material and nonmaterial things, usually unconsciously, by our mind—by our thoughts. He proved that with a series of lab experiments, done at Stanford and documented in his book, “Conscious Acts of Creation”. The way you think matters—and matters enormously. Our thoughts ultimately become things. It is not easy to understand how it works. That is why it took Dr. Tiller more than 500 pages to explain. But we don’t have to understand how it works to use our mind effectively. If you visualize her as a strong and healthy person, you may contribute to her well-being. The popular DVD, “The Secret”, gives the same message in a somewhat different way.
But whatever you do, please do not talk or think negatively. Be strong and optimistic. By being so you will contribute positively to her good health.
If you want to communicate with me, it is better to email me. I am extremely busy doing research and consulting with health care professionals all over the country and abroad looking for appropriate and effective complimentary and alternative therapies compatible with traditional or regular medicine. Value of one minute equals to the value of one hour to me now.
I had to write this email in a hurry without much thinking. Please forgive me if I said anything inappropriate or hurt anybody in any way. I am sure you can understand my mental state.
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For my part, I know my Aunt has always had a positive outlook. I have never seen her flustered about anything. I am confident she will prevail to overcome this as well. Those with religious inclinations, please keep our family in your thoughts.
Categories: Illnesses
Li’l Bitz is a blog about various topics. Some may know my other blog , amarjatra.wordpress.com. I invite comments and suggestions. Most of all, I welcome your friendship.
Peace
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